Written by Not knowing can feel like torture.
A slow progressive creep through your brain, filling the knowledge gaps with fear. Nature hates a void, and when there’s no information, we often don’t fill unknowns with calm optimism. It goes straight to worst-case scenarios. Not because you’re pessimistic, but because you’re bracing yourself for any possibility.
This has been my life for the past six weeks.
My dad has been in and out of the hospital for two different health issues. The past week has been a roller coaster of emotions, with progress on one health condition, until another one came along to derail any further progress. I was hoping for the best and fearing the worst. I was also waiting. Waiting for tests. Waiting for procedures. Waiting for updates. Waiting for a doctor to deliver test results.
In addition to the conditions being treated, there was also a change in a previous diagnosis. Last year, my Dad had treatment for lung cancer. He had a follow up scan at the end of last year that showed a change in the mass in his lung. A biopsy was done while he was in the hospital in January. And then we waited.
After the biopsy Dad was released and then readmitted to the hospital for a new condition. He was visited by a number of different specialists. Setting in motion more conversations, additional tests and more people doing their best in a very busy system.
Through all of this, we still had no update on the biopsy. We asked for an update from various practitioners. Finally, Dad booked an appointment with the Physician’s Assistant (PA) for Oncology.
He missed the appointment because he was readmitted to the hospital, so the Physician’s Assistant came to see him in his room. He chatted happily, asking how Dad was doing. Finally, Dad cut him off, “I just need to know what’s going on. Do I need to go through more cancer treatment or not?”
The PA looked confused.
“What do you mean?” he asked.
“The biopsy,” Dad said. “What was the result?”
“The biopsy came back as scar tissue. We couldn’t find cancer. I didn’t realise you didn’t know.”
Dad and I looked at each other, an instant of relief.
We were overjoyed. Suddenly, he could focus on the things he was actually dealing with right now. He no longer had to worry about a looming future of further cancer treatments.
The PA said there was a note in Dad’s chart saying he had been told. Neither one had any memory of this happening. And if someone had said something, I wasn’t there. Maybe it happened when he was heavily medicated. Maybe it was buried in medical language. Maybe someone ticked a box in a system because they believed it had been communicated.
Whatever happened, the reality was simple: the message had not landed.
This wasn’t a minor update. It wasn’t an optional piece of information. This was life-changing news. The difference between preparing yourself for more cancer treatment and being told you’re in the clear is enormous. There was no confirmation. No follow-up. No moment of “Did you understand this?” or “Do you have questions?” or even “Let me make sure this has been received.”
It was assumed.
And that assumption caused weeks of unnecessary fear.
I’ve seen this before.
Not in hospitals, but in organisations.
This is why I often join a project. It can be an emotional time. Anything from anger, confusion, fear, and disappointment. When I investigate how important information is being delivered, the answer is often: “We sent an email.”
An email.
Sent through a system with no tracking of open rates. No idea who actually saw it. Sometimes the most important information is buried at the bottom. Sometimes it’s written in complex language that assumes context people don’t have. Sometimes it’s sent at a time when everyone is overwhelmed and distracted.
And for those on the receiving end, it sometimes feels like it came out of nowhere. There is often a strong communications plan supporting the information. But there is a critical step missing.
The communication was delivered, but not confirmed.
Confirmation kills assumptions.
It’s not “we sent the message”, but “we know it landed”. It’s not “we explained it”, but “we know it was understood”. It’s not just “this was shared”, but “this was absorbed, and people had space to respond”.
Timing matters too. My dad may have been told technically. However, if that took place while he was exhausted, medicated, in pain, or overwhelmed with other information, then functionally, he wasn’t told. Communication doesn’t exist in a vacuum. It lands in a body, a brain, a moment.
The same is true at work.
You can’t assume people will absorb critical information if they’re exhausted, distracted, under pressure, or lacking context. You can’t assume understanding just because words were spoken or written. And you definitely can’t assume silence means everything is fine.
Silence often means people are filling the void themselves. So how do we keep that from happening?
A Checklist for Closing the Communication Gap
When information is critical, don’t rely on assumptions. Use confirmation.
- Use more than one channel
Share important information consistently across channels, not once and not in one place. A dedicated Slack or Microsoft Teams project channel allows messages to be sequenced and revisited. - Break information into small, timed pieces
Deliver updates in short, bite-sized messages. These messages are easier to absorb, especially when people are busy or overwhelmed. - Invite confirmation, not silence
Encourage people to confirm they’ve seen the message. Ensure they understand it through polls, surveys, check-ins, or group chats. Silence does not equal clarity. - Turn delivery into conversation
Use small group settings where team leaders or managers are given simple talking points to facilitate discussion and ensure information is understood. - Create a clear path for questions
Make it easy for questions or concerns to be raised and escalated to a project team or leadership for clarification. - Empower individuals to guide the discussion.
Encourage them to reflect on what they’re hearing. They should share what’s working and what’s not. Understanding deepens when people participate. - Check how the message is landing
Use feedback. Conduct one-on-one conversations, small group interviews, or surveys. Test whether the message is being understood. - Adjust when needed
If something isn’t landing, change the approach rather than repeating the same message.
After a very rocky start to 2026, I’m just starting to find my feet. I’m taking stock of the path I am on. And more than ever, I believe in the importance of communication. It is not a nice-to-have. It’s critical infrastructure.
Especially when the information is significant. Especially when it affects people’s sense of safety, certainty, or direction.
Communication requires more than delivery. It requires confirmation, clarity, and follow-up.
Did you see it?
Did you understand it?
Do you have questions?
Do we need to talk about this again, differently, or at a better time?
This is not over-communicating. It’s caring enough to make sure the message actually lands.
If you’ve ever been in limbo, waiting for news, replaying conversations, wondering what you missed, you already understand the cost of assumptions. That’s the signal telling you this matters.
Before sharing something important, pause. Ask yourself not just how you’re sending it, but how you’ll know it’s been received. And understood.
Because the pain that sits in the gap between assumption and confirmation can be far greater than the message itself.
And often, all it takes to close that gap is one simple follow-up.
Did you get this?
Do you understand?
What do we need to talk about next?
That’s where communication becomes conversation.
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